hir

Hir is a pronoun that can serve the same grammatical function as him or her (as in I gave hir the message) OR his or her (as in This is hir book), except that it’s gender-neutral. Hir is typically used by people who identify as nonbinary or genderqueer, meaning that their gender identify falls outside of the strict binary of only male or only female.

For those who identify in one of these ways and who are deciding which pronouns to use, there are a lot of options.

Some pronouns similar to hir include zir and xir (both of which can be used in ways equivalent to both nonbinary them and nonbinary their).

However, it should be noted that these shouldn’t be considered synonyms of hir in the sense that they are interchangeable when referring to the same person—the pronouns the person has specified are the ones that should be used.

Hir is often used as part of the xe/hir/hir set of pronouns, but it is sometimes also used as part of other, similar sets, such as ze/hir/hir.

In the next section, we’ll break down some of the nonbinary pronoun sets that people use.

First and foremost: if someone says they use hir as one of their pronouns, that’s what you should use when referring to them. Some people might use a mix of pronouns, such as hir and them/their, in which case you can use either one, or both at different times.

There are a lot of different nonbinary pronouns, and it can seem overwhelming. To help, here is a chart of some (not all) nonbinary pronouns, along with the grammatical function of each one to help you understand how they’re used (and conjugated).

You can plug each set into this sentence to see how each pronoun is used:

[Column 1 subject form] told me to text [column 2 object form], but I don’t have [column 3 possessive form] number. 

In many (but not all) cases, the possessive pronoun form (the one equivalent to theirs, as in That book is theirs) is simply formed by adding –s to the possessive adjective form (the one that’s equivalent to their): That book is hirs. Similarly, the reflexive form (the one equivalent to themself) is often formed by simply adding -self to the object form (the one that’s equivalent to them): hirself.

When hir is equivalent to nonbinary them, it’s a personal pronoun. It is singular.

As a pronoun, hir is used in the third person to refer to anyone other than the person doing the addressing (first person) or the ones being addressed (second person).

Hir is also used as the possessive form of the personal pronoun ze (or xe). In this case, it’s often considered a possessive pronoun (like it’s equivalent their), but it functions as a possessive adjective (also called a possessive determiner).

Regardless of its grammatical function, hir is what’s called a neopronoun. A neopronoun is a gender-neutral pronoun that has been recently coined to fill the lack of gender-neutral options in English (not all gender-neutral pronouns are neopronouns—singular they, them, and their have been used for a long time).

For more, check out our guide to gender-neutral pronouns.

And our guide to gender-neutral language.

Hir is typically pronounced like the word here. Similar words like xyr, zir, xir, and vir usually rhyme with it.